Gingerbread!

Carmella had the idea of making gingerbread houses this Christmas. I don't have much experience with these Christmas mainstays, but I remember Carolyn having an annual gingerbread party when she was in grade school.

I didn't take part in this yearly gathering, but I remember there was lots of candy, and lots of collapsed walls and failed structures. To me, a gingerbread house is something that rarely turns out like you want it to.

Here are some pics documenting our efforts.


First, we must flatten our gingerbread out on the table, or as Aussies and Martha Stewart (we were using one of her recipes, and watched her make it in a video) call it, "the bench". Carmella doesn't have a rolling pin, so we used some empty wine bottles instead.

We concocted our gingerbread from scratch. Martha used a mixing machine to blend all the ingredients, and so did we. Hers was called Kitchen Aid, and ours was called Jon's Muscular and Tireless Arm.

We must use lots of bench flour, so that our pieces lift smoothly off the table. Carmella downloaded and printed off template pieces, which you see around the edges of the frame. We carved around the template pieces, then lifted them off the bench.

Thanks to copious amounts of bench flour, we are able to make and transfer all the necessary parts. We put them on baking sheets.


The gingerbread pieces must now cool down for a few minutes in the fridge. When they're cool, they solidify a bit.

You must now take them from the fridge and put them in the oven. Carmella's pieces go in first, but as you'll see around the edges, they were in there a bit too long. I got the benefit of experience, and my gingerbread was perfectly baked.

We begin building our gingerbread abodes. It's important to prop up the walls during the initial stages of construction, so we found some hardy cans of baked beans that would do the job.

Success! When we remove the cans, the structures are self-supporting! Good thing we used much icing. Its mortar-like qualities enable us to cover up mistakes and fill gaps.

Carmella concentrates, getting her second roof-piece to stick in the proper place. While we made the gingerbread from scratch, we used Duncan Hines icing. It was much more convenient.

Both my roof slats are in situ, thanks to a handy lime. It put just enough pressure on the walls to keep them from falling in. The lime filled much the same role as the cans of baked beans did earlier, but in a smaller more organic package.

It's time to start decorating! Carmella bought lots of candy from 7-11, and we also used candy we got from our stockings. We had lots to choose from.

Placing the candy on was the most exciting part. My magnum opus is my roof. It looks modern and classic, with alternating druppies and peppermints. I found a box of peppermints from Erik and Minke's wedding, and was happy to put them to good, stylish use.

Carmella's house looks fetching with its Twizzler Pull-n-Peel accents, and the jelly butterfly gracing the front. She has an open door, and a yard with trees. There is also a gummy bear family greeting guests out on the front stoop.

Her roof will keep the rain out, but doesn't have the stylishly-cohesive feel that mine does. As a whole though, Carmella's house would attract Hansel and Grettel first.

They're finished! We put them on the avant-guard couches that Carmella's landlords gave her. They make an excellent staging environment for excellent gingerbread houses!

Once again, take the time to admire my roof. So classic! So pleasing to gaze upon! The roof is highlighted by Panda brand (imported from Finland) black licorice eve-troughs and crown molding.

The front of my house has a door bordered by jelly coke bottles, and a window with four shutters made from gum halves. It also has a gummy bear stuck to the middle and hot lips beside the door. There are bushes made from hershey kisses, and shrubs from Ferrero Rocher chocolates.

The finished neighbourhood! Carmella's creation looks very girl-ish, while mine looks like it was made with less care, typical of a boy. A highlight of Carmella's that you can't see is a giant sour key on the back. The back of my house has some bottle caps and jelly fishes.

Success on the gingerbread house front! The key to victory was keeping the houses small, and the gingerbread slabs thin. That way, the ginger slabs weren't too heavy to stick, and were easier to build with.

For all you future gingerbreaders out there, heed Martha Stewart's advice as we did. Even though she's been hardened through jail time, she still knows how to plan and make a mean gingy house!