Wednesday, December 19, 2007

I love Chinese cell phone users.

I wonder what people in China would do if a solar flare suddenly knocked out all cell phone service. Wait! I don't know what they'll do, but I have a good idea what they won't be doing:

Parents won't be answering their cell phones while participating in parent day in the classroom.

Teachers won't answer their phones and text while I'm teaching in their classrooms.

Teachers won't answer their phones and text while they're teaching in their classrooms.

Teachers won't talk on their phones in the middle of parent-teacher home visits.

Bus passengers won't yell into their phones like they're talking to someone across the street.

Bicyclists won't be flapping into their phones as they absentmindedly ride at 5 km/h in front of a ten tonne bus going 30 km/h.

People will no longer set their ring volumes to a level a few decibels lower than Rolls-Royce Trent 700 aircraft engines.

Girlfriends won't talk to their friends for an hour while they're on a date in a nice restaurant. Boyfriends will no longer have to feign interest in said restaurant's interior design.

Girls won't be able to use their phone's video camera to apply make-up.

Phones will no longer be worn around the neck like gaudy jewelry.

China Mobile would no longer have to maintain the cell stations installed along the entire Guangzhou subway system.

People won't use their phones as scratchy portable stereos, allowing everyone around to enjoy their music choices.

I will no longer be tempted to steal all these people's phones and hurl them into fountains, rivers, or into the path of 50 stampeding elephants.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I don't have a cell phone. Thus I agree with absolutely everything you have said. And I live in Canada.